Brooke's Guilt Trip
by Brookate
Summary: Brooke keeps feeling guilty about something and it's driving her crazy. Maybe it has something to do with Kate? It probably has something to do with Kate.
1. Primary Engagement

Guilt was not an emotion Brooke felt often.

Honestly, there were very few things that she ever thought she should feel guilty about. She kept to herself mostly, either staying in her room, or going outside to fly her drone, nothing that would really spur any guilt. Despite this, she still felt a nagging feeling in the pit of her stomach that she should feel bad about something.

What that was she didn't know.

Currently Brooke was mulling over this feeling in her room. She didn't leave it often unless she had classes or wanted to take her drone out for a spin, it might not be a healthy lifestyle, but Brooke didn't mind, it was what she was comfortable with. She was sprawled out on her bed, absent mindedly scrolling through some random social media posts when she saw a comment by Stella saying she was happy that Kate had decided to come back to Blackwell.

Oh, that was right, Kate was back.

The last week had been pretty insane, to say the least. Kate almost jumping off the roof, Mr. Jefferson getting arrested for kidnapping girls and taking them to this creepy photography room to take photos of them, and of course the bizarre weather and dead animals. Despite all this, things seemed fairly normal after Friday. No strange events or any other notable happenings.

Brooke's phone buzzed, rousing her from her thoughts. Looking back at the device she saw there were several messages from Warren. She sighed and let the phone fall to rest on her chest. Brooke had kinda liked Warren, they both shared similar interests and he had a dorky, albeit persistent charm.

But Warren wasn't into Brooke, he was into _Max_.

Brooke supposed she felt a little bit of guilt about that she supposed. She acted really snarky and rude to Max just because Warren was trying to date her, even though they sort of made up at the End of the World Party.

Was that why she was feeling this way? Maybe.

Brooke picked up her phone again and resigned to reading Warren's texts. All apologies, saying how he was sorry for trying to use Brooke. One of the reasons Brooke no longer cared for Warren was because she had found out his recent invitation to the drive in had been an attempt to make Max jealous.

Because of course it was.

Brooke put down her phone again, she really didn't feel like talking to Warren, she was still trying to deduce why she was feeling this uncomfortable feeling in her concious.

Of course, her treatment of Max could be it, but there was more than that. She desperately racked her brain for an explanation, hoping something would pop up.

 _Kate._ Came the singular answer from her mind.

But why Kate?

Sure, Kate had gone through some pretty horrid things, getting drugged, having that disgusting video of her going viral, and being pushed to attempted suicide. But none of that was Brooke's fault, she didn't play a part in any of those terrible things.

 _But you didn't do anything to help._ Came her thoughts again.

This was true. Brooke had posted thanks to Max on social media for saving Kate, and had signed her sympathy card as well as changed her slate to "We'll wait for Kate".

 _But you didn't visit her in the hospital, you didn't get her any gifts, and you haven't even talked to her since she got back._ These new thoughts made the disparaging feeling in her stomach get worse, thus successfully pinpointing why she felt this way. Brooke felt out a remorseful sigh, nothing she could really do about it now.

She paused for a moment.

Kate wasn't really her friend or anything, but she could at least talk to her.

* * *

Brooke paused nervously outside of Kate's room. All she had to do was knock, ask how Kate was doing, and leave. It was so simple.

So why did it not feel like it? Maybe Kate wasn't even there.

 _It's only 7:00 in the evening, where else would she be?_ Brooke groaned inwardly at her annoying, yet often correct thoughts. Gathering herself she gently knocked on the door.

"It's unlocked, come in," Kate called out in a light voice. Brooke slowly opened the door and saw Kate seated at her desk, drawing something in a sketchbook. Her room looked very nice. Everything was very organized, flowers and deflated balloons from the hospital were scattered around, and a rabbit moved about in a cage up against the wall.

"Oh, hi Brooke!" Kate greeted, breaking Brooke away from her observations. Kate was dressed in her usual attire and had a soft smile on her face, but her eyes looked sunken and tired.

"Hey Kate, how's it going?" _Stupid, you know exactly how it's been going for her._

"O-Okay I guess, the last week has been… difficult" she paused, a look of sadness in her eyes. "But I'd like to think I've been doing better, everyone's been really supportive to me, which has really helped."

 _And you weren't one of those people._ Brooke thought bitterly.

"Is there something you wanted to talk about?" Kate asked, tilting her head to the side.

"Yeah," Brooke began, "Look I know we aren't really friends or anything, but I kinda wanted to apologize for, not actually bothering to see how you were doing till now." Kate just gave her a small grin.

"Oh Brooke, you don't have to apologize for that, besides you're here asking me how I'm doing now, right?" Kate was so nice, despite all the shit she's gone through she still managed to be so polite and understanding.

"I guess that's true, well good to know you're doing alright considering… Uh, well you know," Brooke replied, catching herself at the end. She didn't really want to bring up the roof or the video.

"Well thanks, it means a lot to me that you came to check up on me." Kate gave her another reassuring smile. Which caused Brooke to feel an undeterminable emotion, but she dismissed it as she tried to come up with something else to say. Kate held the smile, seemingly understanding what Brooke was thinking.

"It's okay if you don't have anything else to say, it was nice getting to talk to you Brooke."

"Oh yeah, you too Kate, take care and uh if you wanna talk or do whatever I'm right down the hall." Brooke offered.

"Thanks Brooke, I'll see you later."

"Same to you," Brooke concluded awkwardly before backing out of Kate's room and closing the door. That had gone, decently she supposed, she did feel a little better. But it wasn't enough.

She had to do more than this.


	2. The Giftening

Brooke only felt better about herself for a few hours after she talked with Kate. It all hit her when she was trying to fall asleep, there was the guilt again, as usual, but there was something else there.

She felt so _Selfish_.

Brooke only talked to Kate because she wanted to make herself feel better, not because she was legitimately concerned about her wellbeing. This made Brooke feel even shittier. She had to do more. Something genuine, anything besides generic conversation.

 _A gift._

A gift would work.

But what to get?

Brooke didn't really know much about Kate besides that she was religious and way too nice for her own good. Maybe she could ask someone else what Kate liked.

Max would know. Brooke could talk to Max.

Brooke groaned at that prospect and buried her face in her pillow. She'll have to suck it up and talk to another person, but it was for Kate, so that was good. Brooke rolled over and sighed, her conscience finally feeling unburdened enough to drift into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

After classes Brooke decided to talk to Max. The two really hadn't been the best of friends due to Brooke's callous jealousy over Warren. They did make up a bit later, but Brooke still didn't feel like that fixed everything.

Brooke was a little nervous to be knocking on Max's door just to get information about Kate. But hey, maybe she could try to actually further a friendship with Max.

Maybe.

Brooke tentatively knocked on Max's door, half hoping no one would answer and she could retreat back to her room. Of course, she'd have no such luck as Max's door swung open.

"Oh, hey Brooke, here for that drone date?" Asked the room's freckled owner.

"Afraid not Max, your time with my flying marvel will have to wait another day." Brooke replied rolling her eyes, remembering how she suggested it at the Vortex Club party.

"Aw that's a shame, I was looking forward to harassing innocent bystanders." Max joked. Honestly if the drone wasn't so expensive she probably would use it to buzz by people's heads or spy on people in their rooms. "So, what are you here for?"

Brooke tensed up a bit, suddenly overcome by a bout of anxiety.

"Uh, I just kinda wanted to ask you a question… about Kate." Brooke stated, arms crossed and hugging her sides.

Max gave her a skeptical look. "What about Kate?"

"Well do you know what she likes, like if someone was going to get her a gift or something, what would she like?" Max's look changed to one of amused understanding, clearly not falling for Brooke's hypothetical statement.

"Well, I'd say if someone wanted to get Kate a gift they could probably get her some tea, she really likes that."

 _Tea, I could do that_. Brooke thought to herself, slightly encouraged.

"So why are you getting Kate a gift?"

"Me, I'm not getting Kate a gift what makes you think that?" Brooke laughed lamely. Max didn't say anything and just kept staring at Brooke until the bespectacled girl relented. "I just wanted to get her a gift because I've been feeling super shitty about barely caring about her this past week, and honestly for the whole semester."

"And then I remember how you went up on the roof to save her, and I don't do anything for anyone, so I thought I'd try to be a little less selfish for once." Max just gave her a reassuring grin.

"Brooke, you aren't selfish, I mean you are trying to get her a gift, aren't you?"

"Yep, little Brooke's first baby steps to becoming a decent human being." Brooke commented dryly.

"Look don't beat yourself up too much, I think it's sweet that you want to get Kate a nice present." Brooke just sighed. Max always seemed to know exactly what to say.

"Thanks Max, and we should still have that drone date thing sometime, if you'd still want to."

"Of course, I'm sure you'll tell me the time and place later."

"That I can do, seeya around Max." Brooke waved goodbye, just wanting to get the conversation done with. Max nodded in understanding and quietly closed her door.

Brooke's chest swelled after another somewhat successful interaction at someone else's room. This was actually going decently, and now Brooke was a girl on a mission.

A tea mission.

* * *

Brooke's room looked like a tornado had plowed directly through it. Clothes strewn about the floor, random boxes and containers opened and stacked all over, and various objects laid out on any available surface. Brooke had been ransacking her closet and any other storage area all evening. She was looking for a specific item, an item she knew she had, but didn't know where.

"Ah hah!" Brooke exclaimed as she plucked an auspicious tin box from her closet. It was a case of imported chamomile tea her parents had bought her before she started the school year. They had told her it would help her anxiety, but Brooke never got around to using it for anything, she wasn't really much of a tea person in the first place.

But Kate was.

Brooke figured she could re-gift this to Kate, after all she needed it a lot more. Brooke immediately vacated her upturned room and made her way to Kate's door, knocking excitedly, before quickly hiding the tea box behind her.

"H-Hello?" Kate called out, meekly opening her door open a crack. From what Brooke could see Kate looked worse than she had yesterday. Her eyes were puffy and the shadows under her eyes indicated a lack of sleep.

"Hey Kate, um is this a bad time? I can come back later or something." Kate just shook her head and opened the door more to allow Brooke entrance.

"It's ok Brooke, come in." Brooke cautiously stepped into the room, noticing everything was about the same, except the whole room was cast in a dismal gloom. "It's good to see you again Brooke, I'm glad your visit the other day wasn't a onetime thing." Kate gave a weak smile.

"Yeah me too." Before either of them could process that, Brooke quickly whipped out the tea from behind her back. "Here I wanted to get you something, you know because I was being a horrible person and neglected to do so while you were in the hospital." If Kate heard Brooke's self-demeaning insult she didn't call any attention to it, instead her face perked up in pleasant surprise.

"Oh, thank you Brooke, you really didn't have to get me anything." Kate thanked, graciously taking the box out of Brooke's hands.

"Trust me I did, anyway it's chamomile, it's supposed to help with anxiety, which from the look of things you desperately need." Brooke internally chastised herself for being too blunt, but Kate didn't seem to take any offense.

"It's that obvious huh?" Kate gave a shaky laugh.

"I mean honestly you look pretty terrible, what's the matter?" _Stop being rude you moron_.

"Well it's the same as usual I suppose, some days I can put it behind me and get through things ok, but other days I-I can't as m-much and…" Kate stopped talking and she began to noticeably shake and looked to be on the verge of tears.

Brooke was frozen in fear; comforting people was not something she was particularly good at. She had no idea what to do, but she couldn't just stand there and watch.

Before she really knew what she was doing Brooke had Kate wrapped in a tight hug as the shaken blonde sobbed miserably onto the shorter girl's shoulder. The two stood like that for some time, Kate crying and Brooke doing her best to keep Kate in a comforting embrace. Neither said anything, and even if she was given a lifetime Brooke still didn't think she could've come up with anything helpful to say.

After what felt like an hour Kate broke away from Brooke and wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her shirt.

"S-Sorry Brooke, s-sometimes all these feelings build up and-."

"Hey yeah I get it, it's fine." Brooke interrupted, casually trying to rub out some of the tear stains out of her hoodie. For a moment the two stood in silence again before Kate spoke up.

"Brooke, I just want to thank you for, um your support and the tea." Kate awkwardly hugged herself. Brooke had to admit, even after crying her heart out Kate still looked cute when she did that.

 _What?_

"It's no problem, after what just happened I can tell you can probably make good use of it." Brooke responded, trying to clear her mind from that random thought she just had.

"Y-Yeah you're right." Kate awkwardly laughed at Brooke's remark. "Hey Brooke, could I ask you a favor?"

"Sure, what is it?"

"I mean as you can see I'm not feeling too well at the moment, so do you think you could just, um, sit with me for a bit, I just need someone to be with me right now, I mean you don't have to and if you want to leave you can." Kate looked at Brooke, expectant for her answer.

Brooke was shocked, she didn't really expect Kate to _want_ to spend time with her, especially for emotional support. As much as Brooke did want to go back to her room, she couldn't, Kate needed her.

"Yeah of course I can," Brooke nodded. Kate gave her a smile that was absolutely drenched in joy and motioned for Brooke to take a seat on the couch. The two sat down in silence, nothing really needed to be said.

They sat there for an hour or so into the night in sort of a stasis, until light snoring roused Brooke from her stupor. Kate had fallen asleep and was dozing lightly on the edge of the couch. Brooke carefully got up off the couch, trying not to wake up the sleeping Kate.

As Brooke approached the door she turned to look at Kate, she seemed to be sleeping well, although she was shivering slightly. Quietly Brooke grabbed one of Kate's blanket and slowly draped it over the dozing figure. Kate's lips turned up into a slight smile.

"Thank you, Brooke." She said in a barely audible whisper. Brooke's face flushed red and she slowly backed out of the room and closed the door behind her.

Brooke leaned up against the wall and clutched her chest trying to compose herself.

 _What is going on with me?_


	3. Of Drawings and Drones

Brooke had started feeling less guilty as the days dragged on. She didn't feel the need to constantly check in on Kate and was satisfied with smiles and friendly waves in passing.

Honestly Brooke had somewhat been trying to avoid any serious conversation with Kate, not that she didn't want to talk, but she didn't want the weird moment between them that one night brought up.

It was now Friday and classes had just gotten out. After some deliberation Brooke decided she would finally take her drone out for a spin. She hadn't been in the mood to fly it for the past week, but now she felt well enough to do so.

She entered the girl's dorm and found it oddly quiet, it made sense, Brooke tended to rush back to the safety of her room and most of the other students liked to loiter. Before she entered her room, she went to check the bulletin board. Brooke had posted a flyer for her _'Geek Grrls Book Club'_ hoping to find others who shared an interest in the kind of fantasy and sci-fi novels she liked.

Of course, she never received a single email of interest so she didn't set a meeting and forgot to take the notice down. Grumbling to herself, Brooke yanked the paper off the wall and crumpled it up and threw it on the floor.

 _Someone else can clean that up_ , Brooke thought bitterly. Like minded friends were impossible to come by, they were either hard to get along with or just wanted to use Brooke for some sort of jealousy plot. Brooke rubbed her temples to prevent herself from succumbing to a salty rage. _Come on Brooke stop getting worked up and let's go fly a drone._

Brooke unlocked the door to her room and stepped inside, it was still somewhat of a disaster area from when she was looking for the tea, but her room was always kind of a mess. She picked up her drone up from her shelf and shook some bits of paper off it. Thinking about it she decided to see if Max wanted to come fly it with her, she was trying to make some actual friends and Max wasn't the worst person she knew.

[ **Brooke:** Hey gonna take drone out 4 a spin u wanna join?]

Brooke stared at her phone, hoping Max would text back soon, she hated waiting.

[ **Max:** Sorry Brooke, hangin out with my gf tonite, maybe some other time]

[ **Brooke:** k]

Brooke let out a heavy sigh, why did she even bother? Picking up the drone and tablet she exited her room and headed outside.

* * *

Most of the students were hanging out at the quad, either socializing or walking off to somewhere else. Normally Brooke tried to avoid being around the mass of people, but flying it around the dorm was boring as there wasn't as much interesting stuff to look at.

Brooke found a quiet spot besides a tree and began to set up her drone, making sure everything was connected properly and nothing was broken before she decided to fly it around. Take off went smooth and her little drone was now soaring through the sky above the quad.

Various students were milling about, so far nothing interesting was happening. Victoria and her posse were chatting it up over by the entrance to the school. Brooke sneered, the Bitch Queen of Blackwell had gotten a bit better over the past week, certainly less hostile, but Brooke still loathed her for what she put Kate through.

 _That's why you hate her? Just because of Kate?_ Brooke couldn't quite tell the tone of her own thoughts. I mean of course she cared about Kate, just like everyone else did. Right? Shaking herself from her own thoughts, Brooke decided to focus her attention elsewhere. She flew her drone over by the fountain where her thoughts went right back to Kate, as the girl in question was seated on the fountain's edge, drawing in her sketchbook.

Brooke couldn't help passing around her and watching. She really didn't know what she was trying to accomplish here, I mean this was pretty creepy. But Kate looked so happy drawing, almost made you forget what she had gone through the last few weeks. Suddenly, Kate looked up and waved up at the drone, a warm smile on her face.

Brooke was really glad her face was pointed down to her tablet because she was blushing profusely. She piloted the drone elsewhere for a bit and eventually decided to land it as most of the students cleared out. As she was picking it up a familiar voice came from behind her.

"Hi Brooke, how are you?" Kate asked. Brooke turned to face Kate to find her hugging a sketchbook close to her chest with the same smile she had earlier.

"Hey Kate, I'm doing ok," Brooke responded casually.

"Is that your drone?"

"Yep good ol' B400 EVO." Brooke picked up the drone, and flipped it over in her hands.

"Aren't drones like weapons or something?" Brooke's face immediately twisted into a scowl.

"Sure, they are to the uninformed masses who don't know a thing about them." She spat venomously. Kate recoiled at the harshness of Brooke's reply.

"S-Sorry" Kate's smile faded away and she clutched at her sketchbook tighter. Brooke immediately felt like shit.

 _Really Brooke? After all she's been through and how you've tried to be nice and you just go right back to being rude?_

"No, I'm sorry, sometimes I need to stop being so rude towards people, I just get upset when people make assumptions about something I like so much." Kate exhaled and nodded, she still looked shaken, but not as hurt.

"So, I saw you drawing, how's that going?" Brooke asked, seeking to change the subject. At this the quiet girl perked up with a resurgence in enthusiasm.

"O-Oh right, my drawings, I've been drawing more lately, I think it's really helping me feel better, more confident, I don't know if that makes sense or not."

"Yeah no I totally get it." Brooke lied, she didn't really get most art stuff, but Kate seemed happy with it, so that's what counted.

"Anyway, I really want to draw and write children's books someday, I know that sounds kind of lame to you." Kate was now awkwardly looking away, probably afraid Brooke would make fun of her for it. Thinking about that made Brooke chuckle to herself.

"Nah, I think that's cool, at least you know what you want to do with your life." Kate smiled again, at least Brooke said something right for once. "Hey um do you mind if I see your drawings?"

"O-Oh sure!" Kate responded in shock, clearly not expecting Brooke of all people to take in an interest in her art. She hesitantly handed over her sketchbook to Brooke, who set her drone down before flipping through it.

Brooke wasn't an artist on any level, but Kate's drawings were really good. I mean they were mostly little character doodles and animals, but it had a nice and cute simplistic charm to it.

 _Kind of like Kate_. Brooke shook her head, she needed to get these thoughts out of her head.

"Something wrong?" Kate asked clearly noticing Brooke's head shake.

"N-No, just thinking about something else." _Don't stutter Brooke, it'll just make things worse somehow_. "These are really nicely done drawings, better than anything I could possibly hope to do." Kate giggled at Brooke's compliment.

"Thanks Brooke, it means a lot coming from you." Before Brooke could ask what that meant, Kate spoke up again. "Also, I was wondering, um… do you have any plans today?" Brooke raised an eyebrow in curiosity.

"Not really, why?"

"Well Max and I usually have weekly tea sessions, but she had to cancel today, and I guess I was wondering if maybe you'd want to join me instead? I mean I understand if you don't want to." Kate looked extremely vulnerable and Brooke couldn't think of any reason to say no.

"Yeah sure, better than sitting in my room wallowing in self-loathing." Kate tilted her head to the side, not sure if this was a joke or something Brooke actually did.

"O-Ok, great! I guess just come by my room around 5?"

"Gotcha, see you then, oh and here's your drawings back." Brooke gave the book back to Kate who took it back with a smile.

"Thanks Brooke, um, bye!" Kate clumsily waved goodbye before walking away to get ready for their tea date. Brooke couldn't help but smiling as she was surprisingly looking forward to it.


	4. Social Anxie-tea

Brooke returned to her room to get ready for her tea date with Kate. The analog clock in her room said it was 4:46, so Brooke had about 15 minutes to kill. She sat on her bed and played some games on her phone, before a thought occurred to her.

Was this a date?

Of course not, it was a tea date in the platonic, get-together sense.

Right?

Brooke's heartbeat started to accelerate and she found herself clutching her chest. _Stop getting nervous, it's not a date, it's just tea._ But anxiety was a slippery slope and she was already starting to breath rapidly. Brooke had always had a bit of an anxiety problem, it's part of the reason her parents got her that tea.

Most of Brooke's anxiety stemmed from social situations, she didn't do empathy well, and her constant sarcastic attitude had the tendency to push people away. She couldn't help it, that's just how she was. Usually she could talk to most people fine, but whenever the stakes were high, like a one on one tea session with someone she had odd feelings about, Brooke tended to choke.

Gripping the edge of her bed, Brooke tried taking deep breaths until she steadied herself and laid back in a huff.

She was never going to survive this tea date.

* * *

Brooke arrived at 5pm sharp, after all it was just down the hall, so she really had no reason to be late.

Kate's door was already open and Brooke could see she had arranged a short table next to the couch with a couple of cups on it. Kate was doting by the windowsill fiddling with something Brooke couldn't quite see.

Brooke rapped on the door with the back of her hand.

"Anyone home?" She asked in a sarcastic droll. Kate spun around quickly and composed herself, obviously caught off guard.

"O-Oh Brooke! Come on in!" She chirped, grabbing a tea kettle that was behind her and set it down on the table. "Have a seat!" She patted the couch, smiling.

Brooke began to feel flustered, feeling a little hot in her hoodie. After closing the door, she took a seat next to Kate, who began pouring hot water into the tea cups. "Now you might want to let it sit for a bit, it's pretty hot."

 _Like you._ Brooke mentally slapped herself, she really needed to stop having these thoughts. Kate blew on her cup and took a small sip.

"This is really good chamomile tea, thanks for getting it for me Brooke!" Kate gave her another trademark smile. Brooke gave a small smile back, it was good to see Kate happy again, she must be doing a lot better.

Brooke decided to take a sip of her cup, the tea tasted ok, warm and soothing, filling Brooke's stomach with a pleasurable aura.

"How is it?" Kate questioned.

"Pretty good for boiled leaf water." Kate giggled at Brooke's comment, which caused Brooke to feel even hotter.

"Are you okay Brooke? You look uncomfortable." Kate's smile shifted to a slight frown of concern.

"Yeah just a little hot." Brooke responded, involuntary tugging at her jacket.

"You know if you're hot you can take off your jacket, I mean I assume you've got a shirt on under that."

"Uh yeah, sure." Taking off a jacket shouldn't be nerve wracking, but it was. Kate looked at her, either expecting Brooke to do something, or say something else.

Brooke huffed and began taking off her hoodie, pulling it over her head and clumping it up on the side of the couch.

Kate looked at her and laughed into her hand.

"What, did my mask peel off to reveal my lizard head?" This caused Kate to laugh harder and instead of feeling perturbed, Brooke felt, lighter? Happy? Whatever it was she felt good.

"N-No," Kate managed to get out, "Your shirt." Kate pointed to Brooke, still smiling. Brooke looked down in confusion, all she was wearing was a simple graphic tee with a 1-up mushroom that said: ' _Get a Life'_.

"Really, you thought it was that funny?" She asked incredulously.

"No, I thought it was _punny_." Kate giggled at her own joke. Brooke found that adorable laugh infectious, and soon she was giggling along with her.

"So, this is what you usually do at these tea sessions, giggle at dumb stuff?"

"W-Well I guess, Max and I usually just talk about anything really, it's just nice to spend time with someone else you know?"

"Yeah, so um, uh…" Brooke trailed off, looking around, trying to come up with some other conversation topic. Her eyes finally came to rest on Kate's violin case, which was leaning up against her desk. "Do you still play the violin?"

Kate's smile faltered slightly

"I-I haven't really played it since, you know… I've been meaning to try practicing again, but I really haven't found the motivation."

"I get that, lack of motivation sucks, but hey playing the violin is pretty cool."

"Do you like the violin?"

"Well I guess I like it as much as any other instrument." Brooke shrugged. She wasn't much a music buff, so she was mostly indifferent towards it. "Well one time I saw a YouTube video of a violin cover of Through the Fire and the Flames, it was really bad ass."

"Through the Fire and the Flames?" Kate asked curiously, head tilted to the side.

"It's this power metal song, so it was cool to see a violin rendition of it, it felt really medieval, which I of course loved."

"You like metal music?"

"A little yeah." Brooke didn't want to admit her music playlist was full of video game OSTs and anime openings. Brooke looked over at Kate and saw her typing something into her phone, before putting it back in her pocket.

"I've really enjoyed this tea session with you Brooke."

"Yeah even though we barely drank any tea." Both cups sat untouched on the table, probably tepid or room temperature by now.

"You know I didn't think you'd actually agree to do this with me." Kate admitted, looking a little dismal.

"Why's that?" Brooke questioned, genuinely interested.

"Well I just didn't think you were my friend or anything." Kate now was gripping her shoulder nervously.

"What made you think that?"

"Y-You kind of made fun of me a lot, for being religious." And with that, a long-suppressed memory of Brooke's resurfaced.

* * *

" _Hey Kate, on your way to the abstinence club meeting?" Brooke asked Kate dryly. Kate was all dressed up and making her way towards the exit of the dorms._

" _No, I'm just heading to church." Kate responded calmly. Brooke just rolled her eyes._

" _Same thing," Brooke snorted, "I don't see how you can possibly believe in something that obviously fake." Kate flinched, like Brooke had punched her._

" _I mean not everyone has to believe in my faith, but that doesn't mean it's just a bunch of lies."_

" _Sure."_

" _Regardless, the morals and ideals it teaches are what's most important really." Brooke still wasn't having any of it._

" _Yeah like you can't have good morals without joining a glorified cult." Kate didn't respond to that one, Brooke was barely listening, and Kate doubted this argument was going to go anywhere._

" _Look if you wanna bail on your 'Holy Christian Faith' and join the rest of the intelligent populace, just talk to me and I can lead you to the wonderful world of atheism."_

" _I-I think I'll pass." Kate turned away and began her walk to church, with Brooke smirking behind her._

* * *

"Brooke! Brooke! Are you ok?" Kate cried out in a panicked tone. Brooke snapped back to reality, Kate had her hands on Brooke's shoulders, a look of concern on her face. That memory was one Brooke had desperately tried to suppress, hoping if she forgot about it she'd feel less shit about it. But guilt has a way of coming back to you.

"W-What happened?" Brooke inquired.

"I said you made fun of me for my religion, a-and you sort of spaced out for a while and wouldn't respond to anything, I was just worried…" Brooke started shaking. She had been such a rude asshole to Kate, and here she was, being concerned about Brooke.

"K-Kate, shit, I-I'm so sorry." Brooke couldn't stop herself from swearing, she knew Kate didn't like it, but it just came out. Her glasses were starting to fog up, was she crying?

"Brooke it's okay-"

"No it isn't!" Brooke pushed Kate away, taking off her glasses and rubbing her reddening eyes. "I was such an ass to you, I mean I guess I wasn't as bad as Victoria or whatever, but I shouldn't have insulted your beliefs like that for really no reason."

"A-And I'm such a shitty person, I only wanted to see how you were doing cause _I_ felt bad about myself, I couldn't even be a decent enough to see you just to be nice, and also I try to act like I stand on some intellectual pedestal and-" Before Brooke could continue with her self-hate, Kate swiftly wrapped Brooke in a comforting embrace, similar to the one they shared a few nights ago.

Brooke stopped talking and simply cried it out, she'd had this feeling of guilt and self-loathing built up for so long, it felt comforting to have someone there to listen and try to comfort her. Especially when that someone was the person who caused Brooke's introspective guilt.

"It's okay Brooke" Even though the statement was simple, Kate said it with such certainty that Brooke started to believe it herself. After some time, Brooke finally pulled herself together and wiped the tears off her face.

"Thanks Kate, I really didn't think I had that in me." Brooke finally managed, breaking the embrace.

"No problem Brooke, are you feeling better?"

"I think so," Brooke sighed, "Um Kate, are we cool or whatever? I mean I get it if we aren't" Kate smiled reassuringly.

"We're cool Brooke, you're sorry, I forgive you, so let's just move on, no point in dwelling on it." Brooke was thinking something similar, but having Kate confirm it made Brooke feel better. "So, do you maybe want to do this again sometime, with a little less drama?"

"Yeah, I'd like that." Brooke laughed, giving Kate a hopeful smile.


	5. This is Halloween

The next two weeks went by pretty smoothly. Brooke and Kate interacted a lot more, either for tea sessions or just talking during free periods. Brooke noticed Kate was almost never around after school got out for the day. She would always excuse herself and rush off before anyone could talk to her. Brooke tried asking about it, but Kate stated it was a secret and she couldn't tell anyone.

Kate herself was doing phenomenally well, if you didn't know any better you would never guess she went through such traumatic events a few weeks prior. Of course, it wasn't all perfect, Kate still had moments of depression. This was usually brought on whenever her fundamentalist Christian mom called her to say what a disgrace she was and to come home and away from that 'Den of Sin Blackwell'. There were also the times Kate had nightmares of the dark room, and the photos Mr. Jefferson took of her.

Either Brooke or Max would usually help her through it and try to make her feel better, but it never seemed to work completely. At the very least the students at school had stopped harassing her, even Victoria maintained a somewhat friendly truce.

The only real problem going on for Brooke were her undiscernible feelings towards Kate. Brooke had long since graduated from her feelings of guilt and had moved on to feelings of… feelings of… she had no idea.

She liked hanging out with Kate, how she giggled at Brooke's sarcastic humor, the way she hugged herself and smiled whenever they saw each other. It made Brooke feel light and uncomfortable, but not in a bad way. Did this mean they were just good friends, did friends feel like this about each other? Or maybe it was something more than just friendship.

Brooke didn't dwell on these thoughts for long, no point in borrowing trouble. She was currently finishing up an English report that was due next week. Boredom had driven her to actually complete something early, otherwise she would've just done this the night before. Progress had been going slow as constant noise and bustling outside kept distracting her.

 _It was 6:00 on a Thursday, why is everyone being so goddamn loud?_ Brooke peered down to the date on her laptop. _Oh, it's Halloween._ The past weeks had been such a blur that she hadn't even noticed. All Halloween meant was just another obnoxiously loud, drunken party, except with everyone wearing costumes. Brooke had zero interest in going to the Vortex Club Halloween party, the last one she went to had been enough to satiate her interest in parties for the rest of her life.

As Brooke began typing up her hasty conclusion, she heard a diminutive knock at her door. At first, she thought she was just hearing things, but there it was again, definitely a knock. Brooke closed her laptop and unlocked her door.

"What?" Brooke answered aggravated. Her annoyance immediately evaporated when she saw Kate standing on the other side of the door. "Uh, sorry Kate."

"It's okay Brooke." _It's okay_. That was like Kate's new go to saying for Brooke. Not that she didn't appreciate the reassurance.

"So, is there anything I can do you this All Hallows' Eve?"

"I was wondering if you were going to the party tonight."

Brooke rolled her eyes. "I don't think you could pay me to go to that party."

"Well that's good, because I wasn't planning to either."

"Why, Halloween blasphemous or something like that?"

Kate gave a small laugh. "Well maybe to some extremists, but it's mostly because the last time I went to a party…" Kate trailed off, no longer making eye contact. Brooke swore under her breath, fantastic job on her part for not remembering the party where Kate got drugged.

"Sorry for bringing it up Kate, and now because I don't think either of us wants to think about it: what did you want to ask?" Kate abruptly snapped to attention at the changing of subject.

"O-Oh yeah, since neither of us are going to the party, I was wondering if m-maybe I could stay with you tonight?" Brooke was taken aback by the question. I mean the two had spent time together before, but it had always been to support one another or because Max was gone for some reason.

"Uh you sure? I mean you probably would have more fun hanging out with Max."

Kate just shook her head. "No Max is going to the party with her girlfriend, besides, I-I want to spend time with you." Brooke's breath caught in her throat. _S-She wants to spend time with me?_

"Sure, yeah, fine, um, as long as your free all night."

Kate's nervousness ebbed away to her usually smiling demeanor. "Yep, I finished my classwork and fed Alice for the night."

"Alice?"

"Alice, my bunny, oh that's right! I don't think I've ever introduced you two, well maybe some other time." Kate was so adorable when she was enthused about something.

"Yeah, uh so, come in I guess." Brooke moved out of the way and let Kate enter. Thankfully, Brooke had managed to clean up her room some, it was still a tad messy, but nothing disgusting or anything. "So, have you eaten or anything, I could order a pizza."

"Pizza sounds great!" Kate exclaimed as she poked around the room, observing Brooke's various science and gaming memorabilia. Brooke had the local pizzeria saved in her contacts, sometimes she was too lazy to leave her room to eat. Brooke decided one large pizza would be enough for the two of them.

"Hey Katie, what do you like on your Pizza?"

"Just olives please." Brooke spoke into the phone and ordered a large pizza, half pepperoni, half olives.

"Alright, it should be here in about 20 to 30 minutes."

"Good, oh and earlier, did you call me Katie?" Brooke paused in realization. She had called her Katie. She had called her by a cute nickname, why?

"U-Uh yeah it sort of slipped out, sorry."

"Oh no it's fine, only my sisters and my friends call me that."

"We're friends?"

Kate laughed in disbelief. "Of course we're friends Brooke, did you think we weren't?"

"Sort of, I mean I've been called bitter and rude among other things, not the best traits for making friends."

Kate leaned forward and placed a hand on Brooke's shoulder. "Well you're more than that Brooke, you're caring, smart, and I find your sarcasm pretty funny." Kate giggled to drive that point home. Brooke found herself beginning to smile now, it was hard to stay upset around Kate.

"Thanks Kate, you've got a knack for making feel less terrible about myself."

"No problem Brooke." Kate pulled her into a completely platonic hug. Brooke wondered for a bit what a non-platonic interaction would be like.

"So, what did you want to do tonight?" Brooke asked, pulling away from the hug.

"Um actually I was wondering if we could… play some games?"

"Like Monopoly or something because I-"

"No like one of your video games."

Brooke stared at Kate with an eyebrow raised. "I didn't take you for the gaming type."

"I-I'm not really. My mom banned my sisters and I from playing them because she thought they corrupted the youth, so since she's not here I figured I could try some out for the first time."

"I could never resist a rebellious bad girl." This caused Kate to turn away and blush. "Uh, all my games are in the drawer over there, just pick one you think looks fun." Kate nodded and made her way over to the drawers, trying to hide her face, which was flushing red.

Brooke's game collection wasn't very big. Most of the games she owned were from birthdays or holidays, and she hadn't bought a new game in over four months, so they were mostly older titles. After a few minutes of digging around Kate finally got up clutching a game she looked pleased with.

 _Kirby's Epic Yarn._ What a perfect Kate kind of game.

"This one just looked so cute, I mean look, they're made of yarn!" Brooke had received the game for her birthday back in 2010, she really only managed to get about halfway through before stopping, it wasn't really her kind of game, but Kate wanted to play it so she wasn't about to argue.

"Lucky you it's a two-player game, so I can play with you." Brooke got up and dug around in the adjacent drawer to produce two controllers for the both of them. She handed one to Kate and almost immediately reoriented her controller horizontally, to which Kate thanked.

Grabbing the box from Kate, Brooke popped out the disc and slid it into her dusty Wii. She then moved over to her old CRT TV and messed with the input settings till the home screen flickered to life. The two girls moved back to sit down on the couch. Brooke watched in amusement as Kate fiddled with the Wiimote strap trying to get it around her wrist.

The game booted to the title screen causing Kate to instantly let out an 'awww' at the image of yarn Kirby. _God, if she was enamored with the title screen, she hasn't seen anything yet._ Brooke elected to start a new file so Kate could get the full experience.

After the opening cutscene the two started playing through the first tutorial styled level. Kate didn't really grasp a lot of the nuances of basic platforming. She couldn't figure out running and jumping for extra length and would constantly look down at the controller every time she went to press a button.

Thankfully, Kirby's Epic Yarn had no lives, so Kate's poor playing skills were a non-factor. Sure, the two could barely hold on to beads, and rarely ever beat the level with any sort of medal, but Brooke was still having fun. The way Kate 'ooh' and 'awed' over every little thing was especially endearing to her. Had it been _any_ other person doing it, she would've found it incredibly annoying, but Kate was different. _Very_ different.

A knock at the door stirred Brooke from her thoughts. "I'll get it" She said, getting up to answer it. It was the pizza, Brooke thanked the pizza delivery guy and paid $10 for the food before closing the door.

"Well Pizza's here, eat if you want." Brooke nonchalantly placed the pizza on the table and grabbed a slice. Kate joined her and dug into her olive pizza. _Gross._

"Oh, come on, it's not that bad." Kate had apparently seen Brooke's glare of disgust. "I mean olives may be sour and salty, but I really enjoy them, kind of like you." Brooke choked on her pizza. _Did Kate just say that? Is that flirting, or maybe it's just a sly compliment?_

"Um, thanks." Brooke said, managing to swallow, god she hoped she wasn't blushing. Kate just laughed into her hand and continued eating. Surprisingly, the two actually managed to eat the entire pizza, Brooke didn't think Kate had the ability to eat half a pizza, but that girl was full of surprises.

* * *

After eating, the two resumed with their gaming endeavors, making their way to the third level. Brooke noticed that Kate was starting to hum along to the music, slightly swaying whenever the song got to a particularly good part.

"Kirby is so adorable." Kate squeed. "I didn't realize games got this cute."

"I'm under the impression your mom told you all games were like Grand Theft Auto?" Brooke asked.

"Yeah, I always kind of knew she was probably lying, but it's not like I could speak up about it." Kate's persisting smile began to waver.

"Hey no, none of that crap, we're having a girl's night in and I don't want it to end with us crying." The air was still for a bit, and Brooke hoped she hadn't said the wrong thing. But Kate's smile slowly retuned as she nodded.

"You're right Brooke, come on, let's try and get the gold medal for this level, I'm gonna get serious!" Kate's face scrunched up in mock intensity, which caused Brooke to chuckle. Of course, acting more serious didn't make her play better, but Brooke could tell she was trying a lot harder. Through they're extended play session the two scooted closer and closer together, until they were practically touching.

Brooke felt Kate's thigh rubbing up against her own. Neither of them said anything about it, which Brooke was grateful for.

"Oh my goodness!" Kate exclaimed. Brooke shuffled away rapidly. _Oh shit! Did she notice? Is this gonna get awkward, oh man…_ "Look at the time!" Brooke breathed a sigh of relief and glanced at her clock. It was 1:00 in the morning, not very late for Brooke, but considering how early Kate woke up this was probably way past her usual bed time.

Kate stood up and frantically moved to the door. "I'm so sorry Brooke, I usually don't stay up this late, and we have classes tomorrow so I should really be getting to bed." Brooke nodded in understanding, Kate did value her schooling a lot more than she did.

"I get it, have a good night's sleep or whatever."

"Thanks Brooke, and this was fun, we should do this again sometime, if you'd want."

"I'd love to." Brooke tingled when she said 'love', of course she didn't say it in the romantic sense, but the word still carried weight to it. Kate smiled and quickly stepped out and Brooke could hear her power walking down the hall to her room.

Though the evening had ended abruptly Brooke had enjoyed every minute of it. No drama, no breakdowns, just two girls having a fun night like normal high-schoolers. Though pretty standard, it was refreshing for Brooke to have a normal night, especially one where she wasn't alone.

Brooke let out a drawn-out yawn. _Man, I guess socializing takes a lot out of me._ Taking a page out of Kate's book she decided to go to bed early. Well, early for her anyway. She changed into her pajamas and went to turn off her TV. Too lazy to walk to the bathroom to brush her teeth, Brooke rolled over into her bed. She soon found herself quickly drifting off into sleep with a smile lingering from her night with Kate.


	6. Terror

Everything was grey. Brooke was outside the girl's dorm; a cold rain was falling. Her vision was cloudy as the rain kept fogging up her glasses. Someone pushed her to the side and she stumbled, falling into the mud. Spouting off a series of expletives, Brooke slowly lifted herself off the ground and took in her surroundings. There was a crowd of people all around her, more so than there would usually be.

What was everyone doing here? When did she get outside? Brooke clutched her head as it began throbbing. She winced and doubled over in pain. What was going on? She tried pushing past the crowd to get inside, desperately wanting to go sit down in her room. As she began shambling forward, voices rose up all around her, she tried to ignore them, but each voice sounded ten times louder then they usually should.

Brooke's vision began to swim, the crowd becoming a blur. What was happening? Was she sick? A scream pierced the air and people began adding their voices to the cacophony of noises inside Brooke's head. Why was everyone being so loud? She stopped and looked up to what everyone was pointing to.

It was Kate.

On the roof.

 _Kate?_

 _On the roof?_

What was Kate doing on the roof? She had said she was better, she seemed so happy lately, what was she doing up there?

"KATE!" Brooke screamed at the top of her lungs. But her voice was lost beneath the howling of the wind and the sounds of other students. Brooke began trudging forward all while screaming Kate's name until her throat was raw.

"KATE!" The blonde girl was so close to the edge now, but wait, Max would be there right? Max talked her down the first time, she'd do it again. Brooke felt hope for a small moment, but Kate kept moving closer to the edge. Brooke began to panic, why wasn't she coming down from the ledge?

"KATE!" Brooke tried screaming one more time in desperation, but Kate still didn't hear her. Brooke had now pushed her way to the front of the crowd, she wiped the rain off her wet face, although they could've been tears. Brooke didn't care, she just wanted Kate off that fucking roof.

For a moment the air was still, no sounds could be heard, it was as if the entire world had just held its breath.

And Kate stepped off the edge.

Brooke could only watch in horror as Kate's body slowly tumbled through the air before striking the ground with a sickening crunch.

This couldn't be real.

 _This couldn't be real!_

Brooke couldn't avert her eyes from Kate's bloodied body lying limp a few feet from her. She fell to her knees, tears streaming down her face.

"K-KATE!" Brooke let out a choked sob. Why?! Why did this happen?! The world began spinning around her, making everything but Kate's body a blur to Brooke.

"KATE!"

* * *

Brooke shot up out of her bed gasping in short rapid breaths. She was sweating profusely and her skin felt clammy and cold. Was that a dream?

No, it was a nightmare.

Brooke reached up to her face and found it wet with tears. Had she been crying in her sleep?

That nightmare had felt so vivid and real to her. Was it real? Brooke's breath hitched as she began to panic again. What if Kate jumping was real and the past few weeks had been some horrid dream? Of course, it didn't make much sense, but Brooke wasn't operating on sense right now.

She jumped out of her bed and exploded into the hallway. It had to be like 4AM, but she didn't care, she had to check on Kate. Brooke sprinted to Kate's room and began banging on the door loudly, she didn't care if she woke up the entire goddamn school.

But Kate didn't answer.

Why wasn't she answering?

Oh my god, she _was_ dead. Brooke slumped against the door, crying into her hands. She would've sobbed there until night was over, unless Kate hadn't opened her door causing Brooke to stand up in a start.

"B-Brooke?" Came a sleepy looking Kate. Clad in some pajama bottoms and an oversized t-shirt. Kate rubbed sleep from her eyes, wondering what the raven haired girl was doing at her door so early in the morning.

"Kate!" Brooke exclaimed and quickly pulled the blonde into a shaky hug. Clearly picking up something strange was going on, Kate pulled Brooke into her room and closed the door behind them. Kate flicked on her lamp and finally got a look at her panicked friend.

"Brooke what's going on?" Kate gasped once she saw Brooke's tear-stricken face. "B-Brooke what happened to you?" Kate had quickly shaken off her sleep and now only felt concern for her friend.

Brooke took a deep breath and tried to compose herself to give an answer. "I-I had a nightmare." Kate grasped Brooke's hand and led her to sit down on the bed.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Kate asked, giving Brooke's hand a comforting squeeze. Brooke didn't immediately answer, just thinking about her horribly realistic nightmare caused her to feel like vomiting. But as she looked over at Kate's concerned face she figured talking about it may help.

"I-I was outside the dorm and I saw you up on the roof." Brooke paused to see if Kate would say anything, but she just waited for her to continue. "B-But Max didn't come to talk you down, _no-one_ came to talk you down." The Asian girl began shuddering and Kate pulled her into a comforting embrace, stroking her head soothingly.

"I-I was screaming your name, b-but you couldn't hear me and you… a-and you…" She couldn't finish recounting what occurred next, but the way Kate tightened her hold let Brooke know she understood what had happened. "I saw everything, t-the sounds, just seeing you like that on the ground I-" At this point Brooke just couldn't finish, and she just sobbed silently into Kate.

Once Brooke had calmed down a bit Kate pulled back to look her directly in the eyes. "Brooke, I can't promise you that I'll never get depressed or sad, but I do promise you that I'll never try to take my own life again." Kate said this with such conviction that Brooke couldn't even think about doubting her. She let out a heavy sigh and leaned into Kate, who resumed her soothing support.

"K-Kate?" Brooke choked out.

"Yes Brooke?"

"Look I feel really shitty right now, can I sleep over here tonight?"

"Of course." Kate replied without hesitation.

"Thank god, you're such a saint Kate." The lights were still dim, but Brooke could tell pretty easily that Kate was blushing. Brooke began looking around for a spot on the floor to lie down, but was impeded by Kate's hand on her wrist.

"It'd be rude if I made you sleep on the floor, come on we can share the bed." Brooke tensed up immediately. _Does she mean share the bed… like that?_ Brooke didn't have much time to reflect on this as Kate had already crawled back into her bed and had scooted over to make room for Brooke. "Come on, I don't want you to have another nightmare alone, besides the floor is cold."

She did have a point. Brooke slowly climbed into the bed beside Kate, her body wracking with fear, both from nervousness and from her night terror. Sensing this, Kate pulled the shorter girl closer until Brooke's back was pressed up against Kate's chest. The two spooned like this until Brooke could hear Kate's breath even out, indicating that she had fallen asleep.

Brooke decided to nestle further into Kate's embrace, wanting to try and fall asleep. Kate's presence filled Brooke with a soothing warmth that made her feel like everything was perfect. It was at this moment that all of Brooke's feelings and thoughts converged to reach a single epiphany.

 _She was in love with Kate Marsh._


	7. The Pain of a Lifetime Lost

Friday was extremely stressful for Brooke. Not because of classes or tests or anything, but because of Kate. After the night where they had slept together Brooke didn't know what to make of it. Of course, she played it cool in the moment, thanking Kate for being with her and leaving the room early so both could get ready for school. But as soon as she was alone Brooke started freaking out.

She _liked_ Kate.

Romantically.

Throughout the day Brooke kept up her usual indifferent demeanor, but internally she was in turmoil over Kate. She had never felt this way about a girl before. Brooke had never considered herself gay or bi or whatever, but now she had no idea. I mean she _was_ pining for Warren, but she never had a basis for it besides the fact that they both liked the same stuff.

Kate and Brooke had almost no similarities or shared interests. In fact, they were practically polar opposites. Kate was a kind and positive bible thumper, and Brooke was a cynical and selfish atheist. Despite this Brooke couldn't help but be smitten by the girl, the way that she smiled, how she didn't mind Brooke's sarcastic comments, _how good it felt to share the bed with her._

Brooke shook her head, she really couldn't let her mind wander like this in class. She took a quick peak at her phone. _Only 10 more minutes till class ends._ Brooke groaned inwardly. English was a tiresome class to get through under normal circumstances, but Brooke's inner conflict made it seem all the longer.

Instead of paying any attention to the English lecture, Brooke had been thinking about how she was going to deal with her feelings towards Kate. If she never said anything there was no doubt Kate would eventually figure out something was up, she was more perceptive than Brooke gave her credit for. The logical option was just to straight up confess her feelings for Kate.

But there's no way in hell she was doing that.

It was way too risky.

Firstly, Brooke didn't even know if Kate was into girls. I mean she was a diehard Christian, so homosexuality might be blasphemous to her or something.

Secondly, there was the risk of losing Kate's friendship. If Brooke expressed her feelings and Kate didn't return them, their relationship would get weird and she wasn't sure if things would be the same.

Brooke didn't have many friends, mostly just acquaintances, and if Brooke lost Kate's friendship… Well, she didn't want to think about it.

 _Briiiiiing!_

The shrill ringing of the bell roused Brooke from her thoughts as other students began getting up to leave. She gathered up her things and quickly sauntered out of the classroom. She needed to get back to her room to think this through before she saw Kate again.

Brooke's fierce powerwalk surprised most of the people she passed, Brooke was not well known for her hustle. She had just made it to the quad when her phone vibrated in her pocket. Stopping in place she deliberated on whether she should check it, before curiosity got the better of her.

[ **Kate:** Hey Brooke! Could you come by my room today after class? I have a surprise for you]

 _A surprise? For her? What could that be…_

[ **Brooke:** sure]

[ **Kate:** Ok, see you then :D]

Brooke shoved her phone back in her pocket and took a deep breath. _Calm down Brooke, it's Kate, not like she'll bite your head off or anything._ Brooke resumed her hasty walk, now heading for Kate's room.

* * *

Kate was shocked to find Brooke already waiting for her, unaware of Brooke's rapid effort to leave class. Kate wasted no time in unlocking her door and motioned for Brooke to enter first. The shorter girl stepped in and took a tentative seat on the couch, nervously rubbing her knees.

"I'm glad you could stop by on such short notice, I just really wanted to show you something and I couldn't wait." Kate tutted enthusiastically. Brooke cocked an eyebrow, whatever Kate had in store for her she seemed beyond elated about showing off.

"Well don't keep me in suspense for too long, as you know I have an extremely busy schedule." Kate looked over at Brooke, unsure if this was a joke or not, but Brooke's smirk confirmed it was. Kate gave her a smile before turning around to grab her violin case. It took her a few moments to get set up properly, but soon she turned around with her violin and bow in hand.

"You may have noticed that I've been missing after school, well it was because I wanted to practice playing the violin in private so this would be a surprise and-" Kate stopped herself as she realized she had started to ramble. "Anyway, just sit back and enjoy!"

Kate took a deep breath and began running the bow across the strings. Brooke was initially confused; the tune was fast but powerful and at first, she didn't really recognize it. Then Kate stood up straight and intensified her playing into a more prominent melody. _This sounds familiar, wait a minute…_

 _Kate was playing through the Fire and the Flames._

Brooke sat in awe, she couldn't believe Kate was _actually_ playing this. Brooke noticed how hard Kate was concentrating to play, how her brow was furrowed and how furiously she jerked her arm to play the notes. Brooke was by no means an experienced musician, but even she could tell how much effort Kate was exerting.

Through the Fire and the Flames was a ludicrously long song so Kate only played the first two minutes and a bit of the end. Once she finished she panted heavily, playing such a rapid-fire song for that long was probably exhausting.

"U-Um I'm sorry it wasn't the whole thing, and that it p-probably didn't sound as good, the video you talked about was a quartet, not a solo player."

"The video?" Brooke inquired confused.

"Yeah, you said how you liked that video when we had our first tea session, so I put down the name in my phone so I could practice it for you later."

"You remembered that _for me?_ " Brooke asked, this time with a more incredulous tone.

"Of course, I did, after all the support you've given me these past few weeks I wanted to do something special for you!" Brooke was speechless, no one had ever done something like this for her before. She began to cry softly, tears of joy she presumed. _God I've become such an emotional wreck lately._ "Brooke? Are you okay? Did you not like it?"

Brooke just gave a hearty laugh. "No, I loved it! It's just… I don't think anyone's ever done something like that for me before."

"Well I think you deserve someone who does nice things for you." Kate smiled cheerfully.

"Maybe, but I have no idea what I did to deserve someone like you." Kate gave a more sympathetic smile and put her violin down. In an instant, she leaned forward and joined their hands together.

"Just by being yourself Brooke, I-I really am grateful for all the time we've spent together, the games, the tea sessions, e-everything really." Brooke's heart began thumping intensely in her chest, Kate was so close, she could feel the heat radiating off her face and the smell of her floral scented shampoo.

Brooke's entire body surged with a feverous impulse, something she couldn't control. She leaned forward and pressed a delicate kiss on Kate's lips. Brooke had never kissed anyone before, at least not like this, so she only held it for a few seconds. When she pulled back she nervously glanced at Kate to judge whether or not she had fucked up.

The emotion on Kate's face was unreadable. There were mixtures of:

Surprise.

Fear.

Joy.

Concern.

If this were a romance movie, Kate would've blushed and returned the kiss with doubled passion.

But this wasn't a movie.

Instead Kate's cheeks turned a shade of pink and she quickly grabbed her stuff and exited the room without saying a word, leaving a despondent Brooke on the couch.

 _I fucked up._


	8. Why

Saying that Brooke was depressed was a vast understatement.

When Kate had left after the kiss, Brooke felt like her heart had been forcibly ripped from her chest and left lying on the cold hard floor. She had waited for Kate to come back, maybe to explain why she had left so hastily. But no, she never came back.

Feeling like the whole world was ending, Brooke slumped back to her room and faceplanted onto her bed. Brooke began sobbing, wet hot tears seeping into her pillow.

 _Why did I do that?_ She had given into an impulse for the first time in her life and it blew up in her face. Kate was her only real friend, and now it was over. _Why do I have to fuck everything up? I should've never bothered talking to Kate in the first place, and then I wouldn't have to deal with any of this._ Brooke continued her self-loathing, it was the only thing she was really good at anyway.

Hours passed as Brooke laid there, unmoving, uncaring, until a soft knock came at her door. She didn't answer, hopefully they'd just leave her alone. But the knocking continued, this time more insistent.

"Go away!" Brooke groaned into her pillow.

"Brooke it's Max, can I come in?" Came a quiet, yet purposeful voice from the other side of the door. _Why was Max here, what does she want?_ Brooke didn't respond, she really didn't know what to say. "Okay, say something if you don't want me to come in?" Once again, Brooke didn't answer and Max slowly nudged open the door.

Brooke felt a weight at the end of her bed and surmised that Max was now sitting on it, likely viewing Brooke with some face of pity.

"What do you want Max?" Brooke grumbled, refusing to look up at her.

"Well first, are you ok?"

Brooke looked up and snorted. "Do I look 'ok' to you?"

Max twiddled her fingers awkwardly. "Yeah right, dumb question." The room fell back into silence before Max composed herself to say something else. "Look, Kate asked me to come and talk to you."

Brooke gave a harsh laugh. "What are you, her little errand girl?"

"Hey, don't be like that, I'm just trying to help."

Brooke sighed, dialing back her tone a bit. "Yeah, I know, sorry, but why did Kate send you?"

"Well a few hours ago Kate came into my room acting very…" Max paused, choosing her next words with care, "…confused."

"Gee I wonder why?"

"Well, she told me what happened between you two and she just hung out in my room for a bit, we talked some more, hugged, and then she went back to her own room a few minutes ago."

"So, is there a point to this conversation?"

"Yeah, Kate wanted me to see how you were doing, and to ask if you'd want to drop by her room later to talk."

"So why didn't she come here herself to ask?" This question caused Max to frown a bit and grasp the back of her neck.

"She was afraid you wouldn't want to talk to her, or even see her." Brooke internally chastised herself. She couldn't blame Kate, Brooke wasn't very receptive when emotionally distraught, at least when that emotion drove her bitter anger and depression.

"Yeah I'll go talk to her." This caused Max to perk up into a reassured smile.

"Great, and Brooke, I know this has been, weird, I guess, but don't worry about it too much, okay?" Though Max's statement was a bit muddled, Brooke understood the intent.

"Got it, thanks Max." Max nodded and took her leave, half closing the door behind her. Brooke sat up in her bed, trying to steady her rollercoaster of emotions. She knew she had to talk to Kate, but what to say? _Sorry I kissed you._ I mean I guess she was sorry, but it still felt weird to say.

Realizing there wasn't much point in stalling, Brooke left her room and trudged over to Kate's. She ended up staring at the door for what felt like an eternity, unable to bring herself to knock. _Even though I kind of know what I want to say, what if Kate just doesn't want to talk to me ever again or some shit like that?_

Taking a deep breath Brooke laid out a single knock on Kate's door.

"W-Who's there?" Came Kate's cautious voice from inside.

"It's Brooke." Kate didn't respond and after a moment Brooke heard her fiddle with the lock and the door slowly swung open. Kate looked fine, if not a bit harrowed, Brooke could tell she had been crying and she foolishly hoped it wasn't because of her. "Max said you wanted to talk, can we talk?" Kate just nodded and motioned for Brooke to enter.

Brooke didn't really know whether or not to sit on the couch or stand, but Kate took a seat at her desk so Brooke moved to sit on the couch. The two sat in awkward silence for a minute, with Kate hugging herself and Brooke folding her arms across her chest.

"Why?" Kate finally asked, breaking the silence.

"Why what?" Brooke stupidly asked back, she already knew the answer.

"Why did you kiss me?" Brooke sighed, she really didn't want to answer that question, but it wasn't like she had a choice

"It's just when you finished playing that song it blew me away, it was so personal and nice that I just couldn't help myself, I gave into a stupid emotional impulse and I'm sorry." Kate looked a little more comforted by that, but also… disappointed?

"I-Is that the only reason?" Kate's voice now had fear edging into it.

"I mean I guess on some level I always sort of liked you, so that was another factor." Brooke tried to downplay this part instead of going: _I love you so much I can't even help myself._

"What about me could you even like?" Brooke wasn't expecting that follow up question. Kate was shying away from her glance even more so than before. _Was Kate taking a page out of my book and doing her own self-loathing?_ Brooke hadn't responded fast enough so Kate continued. "I mean I couldn't even confront you myself, I had to get Max to ask you," Kate was starting to shake, choking back a sob, "I-I'm so pathetic…"

Brooke hated it when she beat herself up over things, but she hated it even more to see Kate doing it. Brooke quickly got up and wrapped Kate in a hug, making this the second time she's done this, but this time she knew what to say.

"Kate, don't put yourself down, there's nothing wrong with you, you're compassionate, forgiving, nice, understanding, pretty, and a lot more than that." Brooke felt Kate's shaking diminish, thankfully she could do that much right.

"You mean it?" Kate asked, pulling away to look for confirmation.

"Obviously, Kate you're an amazing person, don't let anyone tell you differently, not your mom, not yourself, no one." A small smile appeared on Kate's face.

"Thanks Brooke."

"No problem."

The two were only inches away, and Brooke contemplated trying to kiss Kate again, but even thinking about it soured her mood, so she backed up to give them more space.

"Um Brooke I have something I want to confess." Brooke stood there, curious as to what Kate wanted to tell her. Kate moved her hands to grasp the hem of her skirt, taking a deep breath to prepare herself. "I-I kind of like you too."

Brooke felt like she had gotten hit with a metaphorical train. _Did I hear that right?_ "R-Really?" Brooke was stuttering. _Stop fucking stuttering!_ "Then why did you freak out earlier?"

"I-I was just scared, I've never really felt like this about a girl before and all the concerns about what my family and church would think… I just got overwhelmed." That made sense, Kate's mom would probably be livid if she knew that Kate was gay, or liked girls at least.

"Yeah that makes sense, I probably should've tried talking to you first, like a normal human being."

Kate chuckled. "Yeah that might've been a bit better."

"So, um… what does this mean for us? Like do we kiss or-"

"N-n-no!" Kate interrupted, blushing furiously. "Well I mean not right away." _What was Kate getting at?_ The blonde stood up and began pacing around the room, biting her bottom lip. "I like you Brooke, it's just I don't know how _much_ I like you."

 _Oh._

"I mean this could be a weird crush thing, or maybe it's just a fleeting romance, or I don't know…"

"I really wish I actually had something to say here, but I don't, I-I have no idea what I can do." Brooke slumped back onto the couch, feeling more flustered than anything else.

"What about dinner?" Kate suggested.

"Dinner?"

"I-I dunno, we could go into town to eat tomorrow, talk a little, maybe get things more sorted out?"

"Uh sure?"

"I-It's just I read eating meals together were good bases for conversations, I mean it's probably stupid…"

"No, no Kate, look, dinner sounds great, we can talk more then." Kate looked relieved.

"Thanks Brooke, I think I just need some time to reflect a bit and I didn't know how to say, 'please leave, my whole world is turning upside down' politely."

"That's polite enough for me." Brooke grinned, glad to see Kate give one of her own.

"I-I guess I'll see you tomorrow Brooke, so um goodnight." She held her arms out poised for a hug. Brooke wasn't one to deny her. The hug was less pure comforting and more amorous. Brooke liked that. The embrace ended fairly quickly and Brooke excused herself to return to her room, leaving Kate to think about the day's events.

 _That went decently._ Kate hadn't expressed her undying love or anything, but she just needed some time to figure things out.

That was fine.

Kate wanting to eat dinner together.

That was fine.

Kate.

 _She was fine._


	9. Driven to Peers

Brooke was alone with her thoughts.

Not sad thoughts.

Not depressing thoughts.

Just thoughts.

Like, what should she wear to dinner tomorrow? Where were they going? Sure, they were pretty mundane and uninteresting things, but it was refreshing to have some normal teenage thoughts for once. She also wondered if Kate was having these thoughts, maybe it wasn't as big a deal for her, after all it was just talking at dinner.

Brooke sighed deeply. She was probably thinking about this too much.

Kate wasn't mad, she just needed time to think and then they'd have a talk. Granted Brooke was horrid at talking and tried to avoid it as much as possible, but still. She was anxious about it, but surprisingly she was really looking forward to it.

* * *

Brooke got up early for once on Saturday. She had tried to sleep in like usual, but just found herself uncharacteristically giddy and excited. She gathered her shower supplies and made her way to the bathroom.

It was only 8:30 or so, meaning Brooke got the place to herself for once. Picking the shower at the back of the room Brooke pulled the curtain closed and stripped off her clothes. Thankfully the hot water had not yet run out and Brooke quickly stepped into the shower stall.

The heated water ran over her body, giving her a relaxing feeling she didn't often experience. Usually, Brooke showered much later in the day, the water was generally cold and the showers were just a quick necessity. That's not what she felt this time, this time she felt… _good_.

It wouldn't hurt her to wake up earlier, if anything it was nice, especially since most of her dormmates weren't up at this hour. Well, except Kate.

Kate was a pleasant exception.

Brooke began lathering her hair up with some generic brand shampoo. It probably wasn't the best for her, but it got the job done. Next was the body wash, which felt good as the water washed down her.

Brooke had no other soaps, she never found all the excess bathroom products most girls use to be necessary. She switched off the water and began drying off with her towel. The door to the bathroom creaked open and someone began using one of the sinks.

 _Is that Kate?_

Kate typically got up this early, but would she want to talk right now? I mean it wouldn't hurt to say hello. Brooke quietly put on her clothes and pulled the curtain back to greet Kate.

But it wasn't Kate.

It was Victoria.

The ice queen was washing her face, so Brooke made her best effort to sneak past without having to engage in some dreadful conversation.

She had almost made it to the door when a coy voice called out to her. "Really did you think you were going to slip by unnoticed?" Brooke swore rather audibly. "Oh, come now I can't be that bad." Victoria had on one of her infamous smirks that Brooke despised.

"I think you know how bad you are." Brooke responded dryly. Victoria narrowed her eyes, contempt seeping into her gaze. Even though Victoria had mellowed out a bit recently, she was still a commanding force, and Brooke had doubts on whether she wanted to go toe to toe with her.

Fortunately, Victoria didn't seem to have it in her at the moment as she pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed. "Yeah, I know, anyway me being a bitch isn't what I wanted to talk about." Brooke gave her an even stare. _Victoria wanted to talk to her?_

"What did you want to talk about?" Brooke crossed her arms, not exactly wanting to have a discussion with the High Bitch Queen, but denying her might be a worse option. An emotion flashed across Victoria's face that Brooke couldn't quite place until she realized it was nervousness. _Never thought I'd see the day._

"How's Kate doing?" Brooke took a moment to register that. _She was asking about Kate?_ Concern for other people wasn't a trait Brooke associated with Victoria, but then again, she was one to talk.

Brooke hesitated, wondering what exactly Victoria's angle was. But seeing her uncharacteristic shyness and her lack of eye contact convinced Brooke she was actually concerned about Kate.

"She's doing a lot better, I mean not everything's perfect, but definitely better." Victoria was visibly relieved.

"That's good." The two stood in awkward silence for a minute.

"Why do you care?" Victoria looked at her in surprise. "I mean aren't you like one of the main causes of all of Kate's problems anyway?"

A familiar fire returned to Victoria's face. "You think I don't know that?" She practically spat. "You think I revel in that sort of shit?" Victoria now looked a little somber. "Because I don't"

"Forgive me if I don't believe you." Brooke had meant that to be more sarcastic, but bits of genuine apology leaked into her words. Victoria herself looked shocked at that.

"Look I know that I can't really make up for fucking over Kate's life, I just wanted to see if she was doing alright."

"So, you asked me?"

"Obviously, it's not a secret that you two have gotten pretty _friendly_ lately." The way Victoria said 'friendly' caused Brooke to blush. _Dammit Brooke, not in front of Victoria._ But it was too late, the ice queen already had a smug grin on her face.

"S-shut up."

Victoria snorted. "I didn't even say anything." Brooke glowered in silence. "Look, just tell Kate I asked how she was doing the next time you see her."

"Why don't tell her yourself?" This question seemed to catch Victoria off guard.

"Please, I doubt she'd even want to talk to me…" Victoria actually seemed a little disheartened.

"Look, I'm not saying she'll be happy to see you or anything, but I think a direct confrontation would mean more." Victoria seemed to deliberate on this for a bit.

"Fine, I'll tell her when I get the chance." Brooke felt weird, on the one hand Victoria _was_ a colossal bitch and she really shouldn't be giving her the time of day. However, Victoria wasn't being as terrible as usual, and was actually showing signs of genuine human emotion. Maybe Brooke made a mistake on writing her off, or maybe not, she'd have to see.

"You can leave now." Victoria announced, waving her hand dismissively. Brooke just rolled her eyes, not as offended as she should've been, and exited the bathroom.

* * *

Brooke decided to spend the rest of the morning and afternoon in her room, playing some games and noshing on a bag of chips. It was her typical weekend routine, but she found it more relaxing than usual, maybe due to her early start?

Brooke was absent-mindedly decorating the apartment in _Kirby's Epic Yarn_ , hoping Kate would enjoy it whenever they decided to play again. Her phone buzzed on the bed, forcing herself to pause and check who had texted her.

 _It was Kate._

[ **Kate:** Hey Brooke, you still on for dinner tonight?]

[ **Brooke:** of course]

[ **Kate:** Great! How does 6:00 work for you?]

[ **Brooke:** as good as any other time so yeah that works]

[ **Kate:** Awesome, I'll get you then and we can walk to the parking lot together]

[ **Brooke:** it's a date]

Brooke paused. _Did I really just send that?_ Any worries she had were dashed when she saw Kate's follow up text.

[ **Kate:** ;)]

Brooke smiled like an idiot. She was so smitten. Shaking her head, Brooke reminded herself that though a date, they were supposed to have a serious talk about their relationship, as in whether or not Kate wanted one. At worst Kate would just want to remain friends and nothing more. Brooke could deal with that.

Maybe.

Brooke stole a glance at her analog clock and saw it was 4:46. _Only an hour or so till Kate comes by._ Brooke stood up to look herself over in her wall mirror, she didn't look _awful_ , but if Kate was going to take her to dinner she wanted to look less… dumpy. She had never felt self-conscious about how she looked, but for the first time in her life, she wanted to look nicer.

Brooke began digging around in her closet, she usually wore the same kinds of clothes: hoodies, shorts, and leggings. This time she wanted to wear something more formal, not like a dress or anything, just something different. She finally produced a black long-sleeved dress shirt that was embroidered with cream colored flowers.

 _This'll work._ Brooke smiled, taking off her hoodie and slipping on the dress shirt. She frowned slightly, realizing she looked really stupid as her shirt and legwear looked horrid together. Moving over to the dresser she produced a black skirt that went to her mid-thigh.

Brooke completed her outfit change and gave a sly grin. _I look pretty good._ She laughed at her own thoughts. _Vanity does not suit you Brooke_. She still had time to burn, and so resumed decorating her virtual yarn apartment.

* * *

Even though she was expecting Kate, the knock at her door still surprised her. Brooke quickly shut off her Wii and moved over to the door, straightening out her clothes and hair nervously. Taking a deep breath, she opened the door to reveal a smiling Kate, wearing her usual cute attire.

"Hi Brooke," She waved, "Are you ready to-" Kate pauses, eyes going wide as she sees Brooke's new outfit.

"Um, I kinda wanted to wear something less garbage for a dinner date I guess, I mean I'm pretty crap at fashion so-" Brooke was interrupted by Kate shaking her head.

"N-No, you look really nice Brooke." Kates cheeks were glowing pink. "Anyway, are you ready to go?" Brooke nodded and after closing her door, went with Kate towards the parking lot. The outside air was chilly, October nights in Arcadia Bay tended to get a little frigid. At least the two were properly dressed against the weather, even though both were wearing skirts, so their legs were going to get a little cold. Brooke looked over to Kate, becoming concerned once she saw her with a slight frown.

"Hey, are you okay?" Brooke asked, tugging on her arm.

"Yeah, there's just something I haven't told you." Kate admitted with a melancholy tone.

"And what's that?"

Kate timidly wringed her hands. "Um, I kind of forgot to check the bus times, so we're getting driven by a friend."

Brooke cocked an eyebrow, why would that be an issue? "So?"

"Well, when I told them I was going with you to dinner, they wanted to join."

"They?"

"Yeah, it's Max and Chloe, and I didn't want to be rude and tell them no since they were driving us, so this sort of a… double date." Brooke froze in her tracks. _A double date?_ She was already anxious about talking with Kate one on one, but now having to do this with Max and her girlfriend that Brooke had never met? Her heartbeat began accelerating out of control, there were so many ways this could go wrong.

"Brooke?" Kate's hand was now on Brooke's, squeezing it lightly. "If this makes you uncomfortable we can call it off."

No.

Kate wanted to go to dinner, and Brooke wasn't going to let her anxiety ruin this. She squeezed Kate's hand tighter.

"No, lets do this, I can eat dinner with another couple, besides Max is… my friend." Even though Brooke said that last part with uncertainty, she was still serious about going to this dinner.

Kate gave her a comforting smile. "Well if you're okay with it, and sorry for springing this on you so suddenly."

"Yeah, you don't have to feel weird about telling me this stuff, I promise I won't get mad."

"I-I'll do that next time, promise." The two shared another firm hand squeeze and continued their walk to the parking lot.

* * *

Brooke was a bit shocked when she saw the ride they'd be taking. A beat up old pickup truck covered with rust and other signs of age. Leaning against it were Max and who she assumed was Chloe. A blue haired punk rock girl with a beanie and some ratty looking clothes. Not who she imagined Max's girlfriend to be.

"Kate, Brooke! Over here!" Max waved them over with a goofy grin on her face while Chloe stubbed out a cigarette she was smoking.

"Hi Max, good to see you and Chloe again." Kate greeted, giving an equally happy smile. The two shared a friendly hug and began chatting about something. Brooke looked over to Chloe, the bluenette was giving her an intense gaze, apparently evaluating her for something. Brooke would be lying if she said she didn't feel a little intimidated.

Chloe seemed to catch onto this and let out an amused chuckle. "Chill out, I'm not gonna bite." Chloe gnashed her teeth and laughed at herself. "You must be Brooke, I'm Chloe."

"I gathered." Brooke stated sarcastically.

Chloe seemed unfazed. "Nice dye job." She stated, pointing to the red streaks at the end of Brooke's hair.

"Oh, thanks." Brooke replied, twirling her ponytail in her hands.

"Red's okay, I'm a fan of electric blue though, the superior of the colors obviously."

Brooke snorted. "At least I don't look like a neon sign hanging in a dirty gas station."

"Ooh, low blow." Chloe huffed with a face of mock offense, causing Brooke to smirk.

 _Chloe's alright._

"Now come on By the Brooke, let's round up our lovely dates and get some grub!"

"By the Brooke?"

"Yeah, it's a nickname," Chloe explained, acting like that was a completely normal thing.

Rolling her eyes, Chloe abruptly banged on the side of her truck. "Come on ladies, let's get our food on!"

Max and Kate stopped their conversation and moved over to Chloe. Brooke took a good look at the truck and noticed that there were no back seats, just the ones up front.

"Where exactly are we all supposed to sit?" Chloe looked back at her car like she was seeing it for the first time.

"Hmm, well there is a lot of space up front, I'm sure we could all _squeeze_ together." The way she said squeeze caused Max and Kate to giggle while Brooke looked more unsure.

"That sounds like an accident waiting to happen." Chloe just rolled her eyes.

"Aw c'mon, it's not that far to town, we'll be fine." Without waiting for an answer, Chloe jumped into the truck and scooted into the driver's seat, starting it up with a rumble. Max just shrugged, like Chloe's impulsiveness was just something you rolled with.

Max slid into the car next and rubbed up against Chloe. Brooke gave Kate a hesitant look, she really didn't like the idea of being pressed up against other people.

"It'll be okay Brooke; besides I'll be right there with you." Kate encouraged, making Brooke smile. Releasing a sigh, Brooke climbed into the metal death trap and slid next to Max, shoulders pressed uncomfortably together. Kate hopped in and closed the door behind her, buckling her seatbelt and giving Brooke another reassuring smile.

"Alright, people let's get this party started!" Chloe shouted, giving a fist pump and peeling out of the parking lot like a rocket. Brooke's head slammed against the seat as she gripped her knees for dear life.

This was going to be an interesting dinner to say the least.


	10. Dine Out

The eatery Kate had picked out was an old-fashioned diner called the _Two Whales_. Brooke knew a lot of the students at Blackwell used the restaurant as sort of a local hangout, but she had never been there herself.

It was sad to admit, but Brooke had never been off campus before. She only left her room to go to classes or to eat at the cafeteria, nothing else. I mean it wouldn't have killed her to go out and do something, but there was always that uncertain risk that Brooke hated. She shifted uncomfortably between Max and Kate. Even though the other two weren't in her personal space that much, it was still tight and it made Brooke's latent claustrophobia flare up.

Kate seemed to catch onto this and put her hand on Brooke's thigh, trying to put her friend at ease. Brooke sat up straight and smiled at Kate, she really didn't want to freak out in Chloe's truck. Speaking of the blue haired punk, her and Max were talking about something and paying their passengers no mind.

 _Probably for the best._

Any awkward conversations could wait for dinner, where they wouldn't be packed together like sardines.

After what seemed like an eternity the truck lurched into the Two Whale's parking lot, with Brooke impatiently nudging Kate to get out. The blonde quickly vacated the vehicle and extended a hand out, which Brooke accepted gratefully.

"Come on people, move it, I'm starving!" Chloe announced, practically leaping out of the driver's seat. Max rolled her eyes and slid out right behind her.

"When are you not hungry?" The brunette asked sarcastically. Chloe snorted, but then held out her hand with a dramatic bow, which Max took blushing.

 _Should I offer to hold Kate's hand?_

It was at this point that Brooke realized she had never let go of Kate's hand from earlier. Kate didn't seem to mind, so Brooke decided to press her luck and kept holding on.

The two couples made their way up the steps and entered the diner. The establishment was surprisingly empty, there were a couple of truckers seated at the bar, and only one other person in the booths. Some generic country song was playing on the jukebox which gave the place a very homey vibe.

Chloe and Max led the way to a booth stationed at the back near the jukebox. The two slid in on the side against the wall, while Kate and Brooke sat down across from them. Kate insisted Brooke have the window seat, which Brooke appreciated. Looking out the window was a good excuse for not engaging in conversation, and was less rude than being on your phone.

"Now order whatever the hell you want, my mom works here, and even though she's not on her shift right now I still get a discount." Chloe offered, leaning back in her seat. "One of the waitresses should be coming by any second now." As if on que, a waitress did emerge from the back and stepped up to the table to take their order.

Brooke assumed that they would be given some time to deliberate, but everyone else at the table rattled off their orders in rapid succession, like they've been doing this for years. The waitress then turned to Brooke expectantly.

"Um, I'll have cheeseburger and a water, I guess." Brooke tensed up, hoping that she hadn't ordered something they didn't have, but the waitress just scribbled in her notepad and excused herself to the kitchen.

The air was silent again, with Brooke worrying what kind of awkward conversations they would have.

But they didn't.

Chloe asked how things at 'Blackhell' were going and Kate and Max chimed in about various school topics. The two began talking about the upcoming Thanksgiving break, the stress inducing tests, and other bits of trivial gossip. Brooke didn't interject much, it felt nice not being pressured to talk about anything. Besides, she liked listening to Kate, the way she clasped her hands when she was saying something happy, how she giggled at every little thing, it was really endearing.

The waitress came back with their drinks, Chloe and Max both got sodas, while Kate got a mug of some hot tea. Kate took a few sips before she excused herself to use the bathroom.

This left Brooke alone with the other couple.

 _Oh Kate why have you forsaken me?_

Chloe leaned forward with a smirk on her face. "So, what's the deal with you and Kate?"

"What?" Brooke asked, she knew what Chloe meant, but still wanted to confirm it.

"I mean like are you two dating, or friends with benefits?" Max jabbed Chloe with her elbow, but the punk didn't retract the question.

Brooke should've been super embarrassed, but she found herself growing angrier than anything else. "Are you actually suggesting all I see Kate as, is some doting fuck buddy?"

Chloe and Max's eyes went wide, obviously not expecting Brooke to fire back with such intensity.

"Woah, not like that, it was a joke, my bad." Chloe held up her hands apologetically.

"I honestly have no idea what we are, we were supposed to talk things over at dinner, but now we've got company so that doesn't exactly work now." Brooke was still upset, she tended to get salty when things didn't go the way she wanted.

"It's okay Brooke, I'm sure you and Kate will talk it out later." Max offered, clearly not wanting things to escalate any further.

"Yeah, just focus on eating some food, and worry about serious relationship shit later." Chloe added. Brooke wanted to fire back with some retort, but she realized they had a point. The dinner wasn't going to be ruined because Kate and her couldn't have a serious discussion.

 _I hate it when other people are right._

"Fine," Brooke relented. Chloe and Max began smiling, very glad that she didn't snap at them any further. Kate soon returned, but she looked a little off, she seemed very distant for some reason. Brooke was going to ask what was up, when the waitress appeared with their food. Max had gotten a simple club sandwich, while Chloe had gotten a giant stack of pancakes.

 _I didn't know they served breakfast at dinner._

Brooke's burger was set down in front of her, while Kate opted for a plain looking salad. Brooke slowly bit into her burger. Not the best one she had ever eaten, but she'd be lying if she said it wasn't juicy and delicious. Kate also seemed to be taking her time with her food, picking at the lettuce leaves one by one. The blonde still seemed distracted, like something was on her mind, Brooke would have to ask about this later.

It was the exact opposite situation for Max and Chloe. The bluenette was already halfway through her pancakes, and showed no signs of stopping, while Max took big bites out of her club sandwich. It was pretty entertaining in a weird way.

Thankfully, food had a way of stopping conversation, so Brooke could save her minimal social skills for later. She stole another glance at Kate, who had pushed away her salad and was scrolling through something on her phone.

Brooke still worried, but didn't inquire further.

For now.

* * *

The rest of the meal had gone off without a hitch. Brooke had expected it to be more chaotic, or some drama to happen and one of them would start crying, but it was just a normal dinner for the most part. Brooke needed to stop worrying about everything, in fact maybe if she did she could have some fun for once.

Chloe paid the discounted bill and the four left the diner into the brisk night. If it was cold earlier it was _freezing_ now. Brooke found herself shouldered up against Kate trying to keep warm, which the holy girl reciprocated well.

The ride back was oddly silent. Whether it was because they were full on food or that they had exhausted most small talk, Brooke didn't know. The night scrolled by outside the window of the truck, Arcadia Bay was dark, save for the light blur of street lamps and distant cars. It was small, yet serene, it also helped that this time Brooke didn't find the close proximity of other persons uncomfortable.

It was warm.

Sooner than she expected, Chloe pulled into the Blackwell parking lot and looked over at her passengers.

"Well, this is your stop, parting is such sweet sorrow and all that." Chloe projected, shifting the truck into park.

"Thank you so much for driving Brooke and I." Kate thanked graciously.

"Ditto" Brooke added.

Chloe gave a proud grin. "No problem, you guys have fun doing whatever it is Blackwell nerds do."

"Actually Chloe, could I go home with you?" Max asked her blue-haired girlfriend, sporting her signature doe-eyed look.

"Aw c'mon Max, don't pull that face on me, you know I never turn you down anyway." Max just giggled and nuzzled up to Chloe, a content look on her face. Kate nudged Brooke and understood that they should probably get out and let the other couple have their moment. Chloe gave a silent wave goodbye as the two exited the vehicle.

Once they were fully outside, Chloe pulled out of the parking lot with a lot more grace as opposed to her usual recklessness. Brooke looked over at Kate, she had that spaced out look on her face again.

Brooke didn't like that face.

"Hey Kate, you wanna talk now, I know we really didn't get a chance at dinner." It seemed to take Kate a few moments to register Brooke's statement.

"O-Oh yeah, sure Brooke." Kate replied, shifting awkwardly.

"Kate is there something wrong, you've seemed kind of off."

"Yeah I've just been thinking about things."

"Us things?"

"Yes."

Brooke gulped. This was about them, and it didn't sound good. Kate collected herself and looked at Brooke with one of the most serious and stern looks she had ever seen on the petite blonde.

"I need to ask you something and you need to be one hundred percent honest with me."

Brooke couldn't form any words, it was like her throat was caught in a vice. If she had tried to speak she probably would've choked out desperate noises. Instead she decided to give a nonverbal nod.

"Brooke, do you continue to hang out with me… and like me… because you feel sorry for me, and what I went through?" The words looked like they pained Kate to say, and it pained Brooke even more to hear them.

 _This must be what she was thinking about at the diner._

Brooke wanted to immediately refute Kate's statement and tell her how wrong she was.

But she would be lying.

Brooke pitied Kate.

All the shit the girl had gone through, and all of it undeserved. I mean, she even said she only went to help Kate initially to make _herself_ feel better.

 _Selfish._

But did she continue spending time with Kate because she felt bad for her, or because she actually enjoyed her company?

Both.

But how could she tell Kate that?

Brooke had hesitated too long and Kate now had a subtle scowl on her face.

"Oh… I see, you don't have to say anything." Kate said dismissively, a hurt look on her face, and began to turn away before Brooke placed a hand on her shoulder to stop her.

"Wait, I…" Brooke closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Yes, I do pity you." Kate's face flushed with shock and anger, but Brooke continued before she could get a word in.

"But that's only because of how much I like you, how could I not. I mean I did only care about myself at first, but after that I spent more time with you and learned what a wonderful person you are. I can't help feeling bad about what you went through and I just wanted to help you, but I swear Kate I have honestly loved every moment I've spent with you and… I just want you to be happy…" Brooke poured her entire soul into that explanation, she hoped Kate would understand what she meant, there was really no other way to phrase it.

Kate's expression was now one of contemplation, like she was unsure of how to even dissect Brooke's jumbled mess of a statement. The girl with the glasses couldn't even look at Kate anymore, choosing to stare at her shoes, wishing she could just melt into the pavement.

Kate still wasn't talking.

"I get it." Brooke began, catching Kate off guard. "This can't work." Admitting this made her feel sick, but she knew on some level it was true.

"I just fuck things up, I only care about myself to do anything right for you."

Brooke was crying, because of course she was crying.

 _Pathetic._

"I'd just end up insulting you again somehow, or maybe you'd realize how this is against your faith or something, and decide to forget me."

Brooke began shaking, but not because of the cold.

 _Wow, can't even keep your cool for one night, can you?_

 _Selfish._

 _Pathetic._

 _Terrible._

"Just go Kate, I don't deserve someone as kind and gentle as you, I'll just hole up in my room again and you'll never have to look at me, which is probably for the-"

Brooke's tirade was interrupted by something soft and tender on her lips.

Lips.

 _Kate's lips._

 _Kate was kissing her._

This wasn't a simple peck, this was an actual kiss. Brooke was confused, startled, uncertain, but as Kate pulled her closer those emotions began washing away.

Brooke returned Kate's passion as the two embraced under the cold atmosphere of the Blackwell parking lot.

It was unexpected.

But it was good.

Brooke felt good.

And she decided not to question it.


End file.
